Grievances

Okay, I have to apologize in advance. Looking back at the last few posts it seems that I have been awfully whiny this week. But this is the last thing I am going to bitch about (for the time being.) So today was day 13 of yoga and I'm starting to wonder exactly why I am doing this, because I am feeling a bit pissy about all of it. First of all, I have not lost any weight. I know that is not my main goal to doing yoga (it is to know that I can get through the 31 days, and to reach some sort of enlightenment around being mindful, yadda, yadda, yadda.... more about that in a bit) but it would certainly be nice. In fact, I'm pretty sure the number on the scale has gone up. WTF??? I mean I feel like I am working my ass off (apparently not literally,) devoting multiple hours a day to yoga-ing and showering and for what? I am not noticing any changes physically and I am definitely not noticing any changes mentally. I feel like I am getting angrier, not calmer. What is wrong with me?? ....Someone? Anyone know the answer to that? Because I don't. I am pretty sure I am the only person out there who can work out every day and gain weight. I mean, come on! I feel like I am even trying to be conscious of what I eat. This is ridiculous. I am pissed. Obviously. Also, I would just like to say that I am not even close to reaching any sort of enlightenment or whatever. I am sort of getting better about breathing, but that's about it, plus I think I f'd up my shoulder today. Awesome.