Item #7: Connections

So this topic is one that I haven't really wanted to write about. Believe it or not, it's bordering on a bit too personal for me to share. I know, you're amazed right? After I've been spilling my guts about relationships past, now I put the kibosh on personal information? Well this post is about item #7 on my list of 13. I actually had a post written long ago, but I decided not to post it for fear that it sounded too callous or unintentionally angry. This is attempt at post number two.

If you haven't already taken the time to look back to my original list, item #7 is "Get in Touch with my Half Sisters." This is something I've been wanting to do for a very long time, but haven't for reasons of various nature. I tell myself that the reason why I haven't tried harder to get in touch with them is due to the fact that my father keeps telling me that "now is not a good time." I have been asking him to start the process for me because although I can reach them easily on Facebook, I don't want to totally blindside them if they don't know that I exist. Can you imagine that? "Hey, guess what, I'm your half sister! What up!" Unfortunately, given that he has been telling me that it's "not the right time" for about five years, I'm guessing that it's never going to be the right time.

So in an attempt to limit this post a bit, I am choosing to not share everything I'm feeling about this fairly shitty situation. However, what I will say is this: I have emailed my father one last time, basically giving him the heads up that I am going to contact one of my half sisters. Now to actually email her... let's just hope complete rejection is not in my future right now.

Eeek.